So, like, life is whack. Not the good whack. As in "Wow. Those diamonds are good whack." The bad whack. As in "Wow. Those retro-platforms are some bad whack." I mean. Totally. I'm, like, tired. All the time. Not, like sick. You know. Like, the flu. Just, like. Whoa. Can't sleep.
So, yeah, anyway. I'm hanging with the family. Cuz it's, like, Sunday, y'know? I call my mom. Who tells me that the totally sweet guy I met over the holidays - you know - the one my whole town thinks is Justin to my Britney - has said he may come visit.
Whatever!
Have I heard from him? Uh....well, one email does not a relationship make. But, although it's totally jive to go all bitter bitch these days, I was secretly thrilled. I mean. I kinda liked him, y'know. He was like....I dunno....good to me. And that doesn't happen much.
Oh, goll. I totally sound all Tina. "Gee, Ike. Treat me bad."
Over that.
Anyway - it's cool, right? But weird, huh? And possibly only said to impress my town. He could be gay. Ha, ha. I need a gay best friend. I'm the only girl I know without one. *harumph*
So - the immortal and so-much-prettier-than-me-dammit Scroob says Saturn is, like, totally my enemy. Wasn't he like the God of something so not Gucci-rriffic? Anyway - I hope he wears Prada. Wait - doesn't the devil wear Prada?! That's so, so funny. Where was I going with this? Oh - yeah - if therapy weren't so 1980s, I'd probably need some. All because of Saturn.
This entry brought to you by the last functioning bit of my brain. I had hoped the few living cells would be of the part that reads John Donne, but it was the part that memorized Clueless. I apologize. Curse Saturn. Apparently, it's his fault. BTW - thank you, Scroob, for giving me something to blame. I feel better somehow.
11 comments:
Oh - C'mon Dem! Give me a little bit of credit! Even Dale has a bit of intelligence occasionally!
*Sob* I never thought the day would come when I lost Dem. This is too, too harsh. Curse you, Dale Evans! Curse you!!
I believed the whole valley girl thing, right up until " one email does not a relationship make".
Anyway, good luck with the Idaho boyfriend. He is your boyfriend, right? I didn't really read the entire post.
Aw, Dem...can you really be mad at me when I stick out my lower lip and look all sweet and sorry? Dale was only a one-day thing! Your muffins are forever, hon!
Thanks, Omar. For listening so. I always feel so *heard* when you're reading. Sheesh.
Oh. My. Gosh. Just noticed that I messed up my own quote above. Dale Evans!! Oh. My. Gosh. I need sleep. Sorry Blogland. My brain is not functioning.
So... wait. Which Dale was it? And Clueless - way yes. I use several Alicia clips for my PC sound effects; no other person/movie earned multiple awards in my world.
Sending powerful mental suggestions in a general northwestward direction: "Visit Glo!"
There is nothing wrong with memorizing clueless. *guilty smile*
You what you are in need of some total pampering. Get a massage, buy yourself an extravagant something like a handbag, a pair or shoes or really hot lingere (just for yourself). Get a manciure and a pedicure, light candles and take a long, hot bubble bath. I challenge to make it through all of that without feeling fabulous. :)
Yes, the devil wears Prada. And so do gay boyfriends. Make of that what you will.
Right, this whole Dale thing? What*EV*er. I have no idea what you're all talking about. Love Glo channelling Alicia, though, that works.
But Saturn's not the bad guy, honey! Nuh-uh! Saturn's your daddy, but it's a tough love kinda thing. Saturn brings big life changes and takes you to the next level. Next level is good, right? It's just the transition that can hurt a bit.
Trust me. From 2002-2004 we had the following painful situation: Beloved going through Saturn return, me starting Saturn return, and Saturn transiting Cancer for that whole period - Cancer being Beloved's sun sign and my rising sign. All of which is astrobabble for FOUR TIMES the pain you're now in. Our lives were a MESS. But now we're out the other side and baby, it was all worth it.
More astrobabble on the subject here.
Speaking of being sleepy...I can not read your blog before I've had my caffeine & chocolate jolt for the day...it goes waaay over my head.
Ah well. Love the 'Clueless' snaps...I have SO got to buy that DVD.
Hope you get some sleep, Glo!
Wow. Take some benadryl tonight, it'll drop you quick like a duck on a June bug. Erm, it'll make you sleepy. I'm having hometown withdrawals. You're channeling Alicia Silverstone and I'm channeling Dolly Parton. God help us both. Hang in there, sugar.
yeah, but don't you mean Kevin to your britney? that justin thing didn't work out. but then again, that was ol' brit's fault from what i heard...
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