A Rather Serious Post About Teenagers

First off, let me congratulate myself on creating the links - ALL BY MYSELF! It's a big day for which there are cookies baking in my oven. A girl can't let something so phenomenal go by without adding a little extra girth to her already substantial hips.

The endeavour was not totally a success as I also wanted to post a little explanation of the people I chose as links - basically, they are the people who make me look popular, and I really appreciate that about them. Anyway, if you want your very own link, just inflate my ego a bit (flattery not necessary - comments are the big point getters).

So, on to the serious link about teenagers. I spent this weekend with the 14- and 15-year olds that I teach at church. I am not a big fan of teenagers and haven't been since my own teenage years. They seem so Chicken Little. In the 3 months that I have worked with the girls, we've had 3 major blow ups and 2 girls announce they could never come back to church because....(insert your own crisis here). Most of these major events involved little more than someone looking at someone with less than a neutral expression. Since teenagers have emotional control on par with many of my favorite colorful subway friends, this means that someone is looking at someone with emotion almost constantly.

My approach to dealing with the constant drama has been to ignore it while imagining myself on a beach in the Dominican Republic with the celebrity of my choosing (who has typically required some amazing reformation of character). About 3 weeks ago, I had a mini-breakdown when my fantasy failed me, so I announced that "it may be my last conscious moment, but these girls will use their brain cells for more than hormonal satisfaction ONCE before we're through." I called all the girls' parents for permission to take the girls to the LA Times Festival of Books. I veiled the event in secrecy, merely telling the girls to memorize Article of Faith 13 (summary - "if there is anything virtuous, lovely, of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things) and bring a lunch.

On Saturday, only 2 of the 6 girls showed up for the major event. I told them where we were headed and was shocked by their enthusiastic response. The entire day turned out to be more important for expanding my mind than these 2 amazing young women.

We started the day at Jason Alexander's reading of his children's book about the tooth fairy. The girls were adorable with the children, who provided us with this very hilarious moment:

Child: "What happens when you lose a molar?"

Mr. Alexander: "Well, they call in the special forces...because it requires a bit of heavy lifting for a fairy."

Then we went to hear a performer of silly songs based on classical music. The girls surprised me with a subsequent intelligent discussion about the virtues of classical music, the various pieces they particularly enjoyed and how upset they were that more young people didn't understand the classics. As a former classical musician myself, I can tell you that their depth of knowledge was not elementary.

I assumed I would drag them kicking to Sally Ride's lecture on women in science, but they demonstrated the same level of enthusiasm as they had shown for Jason Alexander. Although neither expressed an interest in science, they did comment that she was an impressive person and were flabbergasted when Sally Ride referenced the recent remarks by the president of Harvard indicating that women were less capable than men at achieving scientific advancement.

Our final event of the day involved June Foray, the voice for many cartoon characters at Warner Brothers. The woman was nearing eighty, but the girls were respectful, interested, and asked questions.

After that event, the girls asked if they could do some shopping. I obliged and nearly fainted when they returned with gifts for their family members instead of themselves. I treated them to In 'N Out burgers where we had an incredible discussion about the role of the church in their lives, their commitment to modesty, and what they expected from the boys they date.

I loved the entire day. One of my favorite parts about my life and my involvement in volunteer work is the opportunity to confront my own prejudices and reject them. I noticed as I interacted with the girls today that my responses were a little less automatic. Sure, we had 12 meltdowns by the end of the lesson, but I know now that there is intelligence developing inside the hormone-racked edifice of the teenage cranium.

I wondered today if the mothers of these girls know what a privilege it is to be their guiding force. I am sure it isn't an easy road to be a mom and it gets a lot of bad press, but, in the end, I can think of nothing more rewarding than getting to spend a series of days like mine with teenagers (of all things).