Random Thoughts at End of Random Week

Sometimes, I just don't get my life. Here's a list of things I thought about this week:

I feel so inadequate today.
Work is a lot more tolerable if you're chatting with friends all day long.
I love breastfeeding education!!!
No one appreciates coughing during a monologue or a tracheotomy change.

Hurricanes bring back bad memories for me.
Bad memories make me weird, distant, humorless and broken.
Sometimes things get so screwed up that no amount of wishing will fix it.
Going to bed, while a good escape plan, won't solve the problem.
Seems if I'm down, I'm down with the world.
My mom is the best lady in the whole world.

Why will my cat hang out in his carrier every day of the week except the day he has to go to the vet?
Does my big cat know I love him less than the little one?
I fear PETA.

You can watch someone get murdered on TV any hour of the day.
Soap operas can't write logical stalling sequences.
I tell the best stories ever and my stalling is always logical.
Cate called me her story monkey. That was hilarious.
Screw the monkeys! I want some muffins! (Dem makes me laugh.)

My work server is trying to destroy my Blog-happiness.
Blog-buddies are so cool!
That's why hospital Big Brother should leave me alone.

I hate that the word "complicated" actually applies to me.
I don't know why I can't open up to people and push them away when they get close.
I absolutely adore the people who, after I get all bitchy, brush themselves off, and fall in step with me again as though nothing happened.
Lena in Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants is another literary doppelganger for me.
I am surrounded by amazingly secure people.

I don't think I should have to choose favorites - teams, colors, movies, songs, shoes, people, friends, etc.
Why does it ruin a game if I like both teams?
I think I would have the life I want if I'd been a tomboy instead of girly.
I don't do anything cool like play sports or race cars or build with Legos.
I would miss toenail polish if I were a tomboy.

I love music by Dubstar.
Not as much as I love the song 'Dontcha'.
I know all the words to 'Milkshake'.
I need to blow off some sexual energy.


So, y'all. It's the start of Evil Day weekend! Please register your plans below, as there is nothing worth commenting on in this post. I will certainly be writing my wicked exploits come next Tuesday. Ciao!